Note: unless you’re deliberately obscuring someone’s gender and know their preferred pronouns, use their preferred pronouns.
Note: unless you’re deliberately obscuring someone’s gender and know their preferred pronouns, use their preferred pronouns.
That’s totally fair, and I’ll keep it in mind.
I hope my habit makes your life a little easier by normalizing they/them (or just avoiding gendered terms) as an un-interesting default.
I hope for a world where they/them becomes accepted as “I’m not trusted enough by this person to be told their pronouns yet, and that’s okay.”
I think asking people to identify their gender, early in a (non-intimate) relationship, is a particularly unhealthy cultural habit. I hope I’m helping push back on that, a bit.
In the meantime, I’m trying to learn speech habits that don’t force you to gender yourself, or to be noticed in not doing so. I hope to help make these kinds of situations easier for you.
You shouldn’t have to decide at a random moment whether to share your gender identity with me. I’m committed to keep trying to learn communication patterns that make it natural for you not to have to.