It’s difficult not to mouth off, but perhaps worth the effort.
My 6yo will look for an object for approximately 0.25 seconds before yelling to ask where it is. Sometimes he can’t even spot things I’m pointing directly at.
Other times I’m taken off guard by his quick wit or long memory.
Wisdom always comes at a cost. We should not shame those who are still saving up for the down payment.
I agree with you. And to extend your metaphor, we can and should help them build up their savings. One thing parents can do to help is to give their children hints without giving the answer.
In your example, instead of pointing directly to the object, I would say, “Where have you looked? Try three places where you think it could be.” After that, if he still couldn’t find it, I would say, “It’s right here in this room. I can see it. Can you find it?” Then I’d let him spend some time looking for it.
I’m an elementary school teacher, and it blows my mind how often children expect the adults around them to drop everything to help them find a pencil (which is in their pencil case, right where it should be) or a paper (almost always in their desk, folder, or cubby) without expending any effort to find it themselves. This obviously works for them at home, but it removes their personal responsibility for keeping up with their own supplies.
If we want to raise a generation of independent, critical thinkers, then we have to give them opportunities to be those things. We have to give them space to try for themselves. We celebrate with them when they’re successful, and we provide them with the support they need to try again when they fail. Both experiences are necessary for their growth and development.
It’s difficult not to mouth off, but perhaps worth the effort.
My 6yo will look for an object for approximately 0.25 seconds before yelling to ask where it is. Sometimes he can’t even spot things I’m pointing directly at.
Other times I’m taken off guard by his quick wit or long memory.
Wisdom always comes at a cost. We should not shame those who are still saving up for the down payment.
I agree with you. And to extend your metaphor, we can and should help them build up their savings. One thing parents can do to help is to give their children hints without giving the answer.
In your example, instead of pointing directly to the object, I would say, “Where have you looked? Try three places where you think it could be.” After that, if he still couldn’t find it, I would say, “It’s right here in this room. I can see it. Can you find it?” Then I’d let him spend some time looking for it.
I’m an elementary school teacher, and it blows my mind how often children expect the adults around them to drop everything to help them find a pencil (which is in their pencil case, right where it should be) or a paper (almost always in their desk, folder, or cubby) without expending any effort to find it themselves. This obviously works for them at home, but it removes their personal responsibility for keeping up with their own supplies.
If we want to raise a generation of independent, critical thinkers, then we have to give them opportunities to be those things. We have to give them space to try for themselves. We celebrate with them when they’re successful, and we provide them with the support they need to try again when they fail. Both experiences are necessary for their growth and development.
When an elementary school teacher thinks I’ve said something good, I can ride that high all day. Nobody can say shit to me now
but the advice is that instead of pointing, tell a riddle
They liked my metaphor, not my pointing
Told y’all nobody can say shit to me
That’s a great saying about wisdom, I’m going to use that some time.