I consider myself to be a straight ally, and I feel very passionate about it.
I attend a church that is Open and Affirming (Methodist). I volunteer for a cancer charity on days when I am not working, and the supervisor is openly gay and married to his husband.
He is one of the nicest people I have ever met, and the thought that I have family members, friends/mutual acquaintances who would tell him that “following Jesus” would require him to separate from his husband makes me extremely angry.
I feel anger not just toward conservative Christians I know but also toward conservative Christians more generally.
For example, simply knowing that someone attends a conservative church makes me automatically distrust them and doubt their good intentions.
When I say “conservative”, I do not mean the obviously bigoted, sign-waving, “God hates you”, Westboro’ Baptist-style fundies.
I am talking about the “nice” ones.
The ones who will smile at you, serve you coffee, and maybe even have you over for lunch, but still tell you “lovingly” that you are “living in sin and needing to repent”.
Those are generally the type of Christians I know and have met.
How do you prevent yourself from becoming too hateful towards them and continue extending Christlike love to those who are supposedly your brothers and sisters?
Here’s a thought experiment for you; There’s a kid on the block who’s dad beats him and he takes out his frustrations by terrorizing all the other kids on the block. It’s easy to hate the things he does and wish him harm, but the truth is that he’s already being harmed. The wish that Jesus would approve of is to desire for his dad to stop beating him and for him to emerge from his pain as a more compassionate person able to spread that compassion further.
That doesn’t mean saying ‘well his dad is mean to him so he has the right to act how he does’. It also doesn’t mean ‘go hurt the dad’ because the dad is being tormented by something as well. It’s about wanting to someday be able to sit down with this person and have them say, ‘Wow, I used to be such an asshole.’
People want think heaven is a reward you get for passing a test. Like you can study up and as long as you tick all the boxes the door unlocks and you can go inside. Nuh huh. Heaven is the shape your soul achieves by trying to embrace care of others as a sincere personal goal.
There’s a story about something called a ‘cargo cult’, in ww2 western civilization and technology came to the pacific islanders by means of the military coming in, building a runaway and a conning tower, and lighting lights so military planes could land with amazing Cargo, some of which were traded with the natives. After the war, the islanders would routinely go clear out patches of jungle, make a runway and a tower, light torches and pray for the cargo to return. This is the status of modern Christian Nationalism, all of the trappings and words but none of the soul or substance. The words and the churches and the books and all the candles and songs and snacks are just the trappings, the visible bits, and focusing on that does not achieve the real goal. The real bit Jesus was talking about was taking the person you hate the most in this world and helping them in their time of worst need because you know in your very own heart that they’re a scared anxious person and not just a nasty stain upon the surface of the world.